Monday, January 25, 2016

Extreme Home Make-Over: Secrest Adoption Edition

Well it has finally happened. It took 10 long weeks, but we are officially Dossier To China!


When Larry and I began this process 6 months ago we had to learn a whole new alphabet. In fact, Larry is still learning, God love him!:) I thought it might be fun to school you on the acronyms of China adoption, beginning with DTC.

DTC- Dossier to China: large packet of paper work including legal and government documents, as well as your home study review with your social worker, pictures, fingerprints, etc. that is authenticated by a couple of government agencies and then sent to China.
LID- Logged-in date: after you are DTC it takes a few weeks to be logged in to China's system so that you can start receiving referrals or files of waiting adoptive children in China.
LOI- Letter of Intent: when you have received a file of a child you are ready to adopt, you send an official letter of intent for that child to China
PA- Pre-approval: you then receive pre-approval from the Chinese government acknowledging your intent. You have not been officially approved to adopt this child, but it's really close.
LOA-Letter of Approval- eventually you receive an official Letter of Approval from the Chinese government and will soon receive your TA.
TA- Travel Approval: once you receive travel approval you usually travel within about two weeks!

Now the moment you've all been waiting for...but not really.

I don't know that we should call this blog post Extreme Home Make-over, though there is definite demolition, moving of walls, doors, electrical, etc., going on. "This Old House" is probably more appropriate. Over the 12 years we have lived in this 1968 bi-level, my hubby has been able to morph it into a wonderful little nest for these AZ Cardinal fans (with the help of my dad and some friends!)


Larry, my dad and a good friend have made some great headway on the current home renovations, which are helping make more room for Little Birdie number 3. We actually completed a secret project upstairs that Larry wont' let me share photos of yet, but downstairs is coming together slowly and surely. Every weekend we make more headway, and I am thankful for the time we have to work on it!

The first project we have been working on is to put down new flooring throughout the entire basement. Currently, the flooring in the family room/office area is finished, but the flooring for our new bedroom, bathroom and laundry room will have to wait as the men reconstruct walls, closets and doorways. Below is a picture of the closet and doorway in our current playroom. This pic is actually from when we moved in 12 years ago. The closet and doorway are being reconstructed to make a new entrance into our new master bedroom.

On the left is a picture of the closet doors and doorway before demolition. On the right is some of the re-framing that has happened over the last week and a half. You can see the doorway has been recessed into the room and the old closets ripped out. There is a new pocket door going into our furnace room. 



Below you will see a picture of our new laminate wood floors. This is a picture from when the floor was only half done. We are so thankful to have gotten rid of the 8 year old carpet!! It was well worn, burned, and stained in different places. 
New Beginnings are wonderful, aren't they?
As we have taken time to clean out: throw away, give away, sell and relocate items in our home, I feel a weight being lifted. Living in a mess of construction for any length of time can be unsettling. God has been speaking to my heart during this process. Even as Larry and I were on our hands and knees RE-laying parts of the floor, I was well aware of how the messes of life can ruffle my feathers. Jesus has been teaching me to embrace the messiness of life. And I don't mean sawdust. 

                                       Adoption is messy.

Though I have an amazing Adoption agency that seeks to streamline the adoption process in every way possible, there are still bumps and glitches, and government closings, and technicalities, and re-sendings, and missed details, and misinformation somewhere along the way. If I had any illusion of control in my life (and I had grand illusions, let me tell you), God in his great mercy and grace has used this process to free me from said illusion.

                                 The Challenges are Real.

Our agency does a beautiful job of preparing us adoptive families for the difficulties and realities ahead in the absolute best way possible. They train and equip and hold your hand every step of the way. And yet, Larry and I realized we were in denial. In our desire to be positive and hopeful and focus on "the joy set before us," we have secretly been avoiding the fact that things are going to be

                                   Really, really messy.

The truth is, when you adopt a child from a foreign country (and even from your own country) you may encounter language barriers and cultural differences, and speech delays, and malnutrition, and attachment difficulties, and fear. Oh so much fear. Fear of abandonment. Fear of conditional love. Fear of not knowing where their next meal is coming from, or if it will be enough to satisfy your hunger. There will be tantrums and meltdowns and sleep deprivation from the child and the parents! Oh what a first year we are in for! But we can't help but think, and really, really know, that it is all worth it.

 Paul said we share in the sufferings of Christ that we might also share in his glory. Nothing truly beautiful ever grows without suffering. "For the Joy set before him, he endured the cross." (Hebrews 12:2) There is no beauty of salvation without the pain of the cross. No new life, without death. And we have been called to die to ourselves and take up our cross and follow him. Jesus even said in John 12:24, "Very truly I tell you, unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains only a single seed. But if it dies, it produces many seeds." 

James writes in 1:27, "Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world."

Darn it, if the gospel isn't just super-duper messy. And he is calling me to roll up my sleeves and get dirty.


The beauty of salvation comes after the pain of the cross, the beauty of Spring comes only after the cold death of winter, and the beauty of a home renovation only comes after a great, big, ugly mess. 

And the Journey continues.....

Saturday, January 9, 2016

Dossier to China...almost

Wait for the LORD; be strong and take heart and wait for the LORD. Psalm 27:14


I'd be lying if I didn't say I am a little disappointed. I know the timing in this adoption process is never precise and can often take much longer than expected. I should really have no expectation at all, but I did. I really hoped our immigration papers would be authenticated and back to our agency by the end of this week. I just learned that it is nowhere near being done, probably because of the holidays.

I know God's timing is perfect and I believe there are reasons we may never know as to why at this point in the process things are moving slowly. It is very possible other parts of the process will go more quickly, but for now, we will just have to busy ourselves with other things.

ON A PERSONAL NOTE
January has become one of my favorite months of the year! What was once a cold, depressing, post holiday season month, God has made a month of celebration for our family!

  • On January 16, 2003, atop the Grand Canyon, Larry asked me to be his wife. 
  • One year later, January, 17, 2004, he made it so when we were married at my home church 
  • On January 17, 2006 we moved into our first (and only) house!
  • Next week we will celebrate 12 years of marriage doing one of our favorite things: Home renovations!! Stay tuned for before and after pics! 
  • This January I hope we will also experience an exciting family event:                                 Getting our Dossier to China!!
  • January 16, 2003
    January 17, 2004
    January 17, 2006




WHAT'S NEW WITH THE GIRLS?
Olivia is currently getting over a nearly two week stint with Pneumonia. This is certainly the sickest either of my kids has ever been, and it has me thinking of our daughter in China and the many sons and daughters there yet to find their forever homes. So many of them experience sickness as an every day reality. Can't wait to see her little face and give her the name we have prayed over and chosen for her, that she may walk in its blessing for her!

Olivia is a very resilient child who does not want to slow down one bit. She lives in denial of any and all limitations put on her. I love her spunk and can-do attitude. Almost nothing gets this kid down. I have enjoyed laughing with her through this sickness. She is a blessing to me. This week we bought new bedding to go on her and Little Sister's bunk beds. She is super excited about the upcoming home renovations, but even more excited about having a new sister!!
Trying out her new "China buns" with her new baby on Christmas day

Mackenzie turned 9 years old just after Christmas and is growing into an incredibly beautiful young lady, inside and out. She is full of poise and kindness and models great responsibility. In case you haven't already heard, this is the year of the Panda at our house. Mackenzie has begun collecting all things Panda and enjoyed many Panda-themed gifts for her birthday and Christmas, as well as a very special Panda birthday party. As I write this blog, Olivia and I are watching Kung Fu Panda and anticipating the release of the 3rd film at the end of this month. Of course all these Pandas make me think of our daughter in China. Mackenzie, who was hesitant of the idea of adoption just 6 months ago, is now really looking forward to meeting and loving her new little sister. She loves helping make plans for her sister's bedroom and is insistent on picking out the perfect toy box with Little Sister's name on it.
Meet Mackenzie's pandas: Cookie, Muffins, Mandy, Bamboo, China, Fortune and Tau Tau
UPCOMING ADOPTION STEPS

January 31: final grant application
February: Home renovations/ reviewing files of children
March: Crossings adoption training in town
April: Yard Sale fundraiser
And Little Sister makes T

As we enter the NESTING season, I look forward to the day when I can tell you not only that our dossier has gone to China, but that we have been matched with our forever daughter!

Thank you for journeying with us.